Thursday, February 7, 2013

Ass Man!

Rush Limbaugh sports the ass of an oversized green monkey. That’s a fact! A half dozen men came forward yesterday attesting to the fact they caught him climbing from his gimp box with red ball stuffed in mouth and chains around his neck and that big ass was green and hairy. One was a paleontologist Dr. Fricker McSniker. Dr. McSniker had this to say. “ The beast was living in a basement cell by choice it seems a place where love ass goes to be coddled and nurtured by clowns. It was a ghastly sight.”

OK, maybe most of that was conjecture but when it comes to ripping skin from bones big Rush never hesitates.

I love Michelle Obama and so does the president and millions of others. I never took to Nancy Reagen’s ass – to flat and the message was – don’t go there. Laura Bush had shape and Hillary – I never paid attention.

We see more ass in our daily lives than faces. Every time we’re out for a stroll we are following and reading ass. Summertime is ass season!

One without ass is one without cushion. I always reflect on that when I go to the Varsity Theatre. A bit more ass and I wouldn’t have to squirm ten minutes into every film.

We are such a critical lot and shredding the person standing in front is common nature. Walk with a pack of men and you catch my drift. You would think they were ordained by some celestial priest to carry out ass inspection for a higher calling. Few will admit the bald spot on the back of the head because they refuse to acknowledge imperfection in themselves.

All women are beautiful. The moment you stop seeing that is the moment of death.

So to Rush and Sean Hannity and the world of sorry ass men who loathe themselves so they can loathe the masses – get some ass!

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